Vday. Hearts day. My personalized cursed day. I never had that uber- romantic, mega- kilig hearts day story. There is one memorable comedic night, but none worthy to hit the romance novels. (Probably because they are, for a fact, fiction!). I have had endless fantasies on how Valentine's Day would be. Reality sucks though. Year by year, the day of love would either bring me the generic date or the book-worthy horror story (which aren't even romantic vampire horror tales).
It was just Monday. Really, just Monday. An ordinary Monday worthy of a few paragraphs.
Tuesday: I remember asking Mike two weeks ago if he believed in Valentine's Day -considering the fact that this would be our first. He said he did. I was a little surprised. A man who believes it, and me.. The woman who has run tired of it. I suppressed any form of longing, excitement or hope for the possibility of reviving The Day. I have learned from past disappointments. I better not give myself reason to bring my thoughts on high only for it to skydive (yet again) without a parachute.
But, my boyfriend believed in The Day. I had to do something somehow. I remember he asked me to write him a poem. The last time I did that for (to give to) a guy was five years ago. I had to try anyhow. So in the zone I went.. And Tuesday only gave me four lines. An unfinished poem. I had a few more days until Vday.
While scourging all the love inspiration I could get, an e-mail exchange occurred;
Atty. Cindy (my aunt discussing family 'matters'):There you go, I professed my love to someone a step up the family hierarchy. Not exactly the easiest thing for me.
"You did mention about going with Mike abroad, but that's a long way off. Are you serious with Mike? What are your plans with him? "
Lady:
"I am serious with Mike.
For the ten years I have been in and out of relationships, for watching the closest people around me get married and get divorced, also for watching the rare couple who lives through life still hand in hand... There is only one thing I can be sure of: We never know.
Life's uncertainty never stopped me from loving. Life's experiences has taught me how to use my head, though.
I love Mike. He loves me. We get along well. We have the same dreams and goals. We adjust well to each other's differences. He takes care of me well, and I have never met a man I didn't mind taking care of. Plus, I am happy. :) And for the first time, I have no doubts. I will say yes if he asked me to marry him."
Tuesday.
Wednesday: A very productive day for me. An early start, my art, the office. I finished a lot early. I guess there was a reason why, after all.
A call registered to Mike's number.
Unknown Female: "Hello, who's this?"This is not new to me, although this never happened to someone I have already fallen madly in love with. This usually happens to me within the first three weeks of meeting a guy. Anyway, I did my usual protocol: Talk to the party you personally know, don't prejudge, be calm.
Lady: "Lady? Who's this?"
Unknown Female: "How do you know Mike?"
Lady: "Oh, he's my boyfriend.. What's your relationship with him?"
Unknown Female: "I'm just his wife, Ella"
Lady: "His wife!??!" (shocked pause)
Ella: "He's here with me, do you want to talk to him?"
Lady: "Yes, I would appreciate that."
(phone was handed over, line was cut)
Gracefully, did I handle that. And I decided to go there as well. Take the five-hour trip.
Then there I was, on a small hut with me sitting across this man whom I knew was his boyfriend, and a girl I have never seen in my life.
I am not sure I could conjure enough strength to go past Wednesday yet. This is as fresh as it gets. What happens next is too confusing for me to put to words.
With everything, I ask this be granted me:
Allow me to be stupid. Just for now. I need to be stupid.
