"Mike is stronger than I am. He can handle me like nobody else has been able to. He is strong enough to hold on to me, despite my own uncanny strength. He can hold me and keep me grounded.
Like nobody else ever has.
Ironic to this strength, he is also the gentlest when life calls for it.
I am like a humongous balloon with a sturdy string and the lightest gas, easily swayed by the gentlest winds, easily punctured by a needle. He is the boulder I am tied to. Stubborn on his place and on keeping me there with him on the ground. Adamant despite the winds. Yet have me float high enough to keep myself from the prickles of my own elan."
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Prodigious Pedestal of Puissance
Lady Schwarz's thoughts on Mike Schmornoff:
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Lady Schwarz Writes Prose
Lady Schwarz wrote when asked,
"ang pag-ibig na handang magparaya para kaligayahan ng taong mahal nya???
or
ang pag-ibig na handang ipaglalaban ang pagmamahal nya para sa taong mahal nya???"
(To love by letting go for the happiness of the beloved, or to love and fight for it?)
Magmamahal ako hangang sa kakayanin ko.
(I will love until I couldn't anymore.)
Magmamahal ako hanga't may ibibigay ako.
(I will love until I have nothing left to give.)
Magmamahal ako nang sagad.
(I will love to the fullest.)
Sisisirin ko ang kalaliman ng dagat ng pagibig,
(I will swim the deepest part of the sea of love,)
ang dagat na puno ng kagandahan, kayamanan at kalangitan.
(a sea full of beauty, wealth and heavenliness.)
Dagat ng kabulagan, katangahan at alinlangan.
(The sea of sightlessness, stupidity and doubt.)
Ngunit aahon ako para huminga,
(But I will swim to the surface to breathe,)
Sa pinakahuling saglit.
(At the very last instant.)
bubuhayin ko ang sarili ko,
(I will save myself,)
hihinga ako.
(I will breathe.)
Dahil alam kong hindi pa ako tapos magmahal sa mundo.
(Because I know that in this world, I'm not done loving yet.)
Hindi ako dakila.
(I'm not grand.)
Nagmahal, nagmamahal at magmamahal lang ako.
(I only have loved, am loving and will love.)
Minahal, minamahal at mamahalin din ako.
(I, also, was loved, am loved and will be loved.)
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Triple Ex
A curious week last week: All three ex boyfriends popping out of nowhere!
First it was Jack Goldstein from almost a decade ago. I've been seeing him around the past few years, but it was all nothing more than just hi's and hello's. This time, he caught me and my friend, Star Noble at the waiting area in the hospital where he works at. Coincidentally, this is also the hospital our family has trusted over the decades. The waiting area is where you wait and pretty much do nothing. That also means it was great opportunity to chat. We haven't talked that much for years! It was all light conversation, really. Refreshing.
The next day, Jon Stall 'pm'ed me. We caught up with each other's lives. Half of the time he was decent, the other half, he was trying to 'relive' the hot stuff. I had to keep things in check. I should be proud of myself, eh?
The next day, I noticed a long list of my friends from a particular group. I decided to invite them all to a conference to 'catch up'. It was nice to know they were still alive. They even invited me on an out-of-town trip. I don't know if they really meant that, or they meant to disappoint me, but they got me all hiked up for nothing. I was already checking the travel details, when they just had to tell me. My ex was confirmed to go. The EX I'm still bitter about. Yes, It was Sir Williams indeed. I just ignored him completely.
I already 'conveniently' forgot he was friends with these people as well. Oh, and just as soon as they said he was going to the trip, one of the conference people actually invited him into the conference. The nerve! I didn't even bother to figure out who did such a thing.
Triple ex's. One that's truly friendly, one that still has the hots for me, and one that feels like all the women in the world has the hots for him. Excluuuuuude me. Aaaargh! I so hate him!
First it was Jack Goldstein from almost a decade ago. I've been seeing him around the past few years, but it was all nothing more than just hi's and hello's. This time, he caught me and my friend, Star Noble at the waiting area in the hospital where he works at. Coincidentally, this is also the hospital our family has trusted over the decades. The waiting area is where you wait and pretty much do nothing. That also means it was great opportunity to chat. We haven't talked that much for years! It was all light conversation, really. Refreshing.
The next day, Jon Stall 'pm'ed me. We caught up with each other's lives. Half of the time he was decent, the other half, he was trying to 'relive' the hot stuff. I had to keep things in check. I should be proud of myself, eh?
The next day, I noticed a long list of my friends from a particular group. I decided to invite them all to a conference to 'catch up'. It was nice to know they were still alive. They even invited me on an out-of-town trip. I don't know if they really meant that, or they meant to disappoint me, but they got me all hiked up for nothing. I was already checking the travel details, when they just had to tell me. My ex was confirmed to go. The EX I'm still bitter about. Yes, It was Sir Williams indeed. I just ignored him completely.
I already 'conveniently' forgot he was friends with these people as well. Oh, and just as soon as they said he was going to the trip, one of the conference people actually invited him into the conference. The nerve! I didn't even bother to figure out who did such a thing.
Triple ex's. One that's truly friendly, one that still has the hots for me, and one that feels like all the women in the world has the hots for him. Excluuuuuude me. Aaaargh! I so hate him!
May I add that, a few days after these events, I received a quote through a text message with a number I didn't recognize. Naturally, I asked who the sender was, and, alas... It was the first boyfriend I ever had. Puppy love, maybe. Pure innocence there.
Life's crazy coincidences.
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